In the original Star Wars movie, the Rebels almost didn’t make it. Despite the fact that Han and Luke saved Leia, they stupidly led the Empire right to the rebel’s doorstep. But they saved the day, right? Luke blows up the Death Star mere moments before it ends the rebellion in a single shot of sweet lasery explosiveness.

But if it weren’t for one random imperial TIE fighter pilot, evil would have won the day.

‘We had an outline and George changed everything in it,’ Kurtz said. ‘Instead of bittersweet and poignant he wanted a euphoric ending with everybody happy. The original idea was that they would recover [the kidnapped] Han Solo in the early part of the story and that he would then die in the middle part of the film in a raid on an Imperial base. George then decided he didn’t want any of the principals killed. By that time there were really big toy sales and that was a reason.’

The discussed ending of the film that Kurtz favored presented the rebel forces in tatters, Leia grappling with her new duties as queen and Luke walking off alone ‘like Clint Eastwood in the spaghetti westerns,’ as Kurtz put it.

Kurtz said that ending would have been a more emotionally nuanced finale to an epic adventure than the forest celebration of the Ewoks that essentially ended the trilogy with a teddy bear luau.

The more I read things like this, the more I dislike George Lucas, and the goddamn Ewoks, and Star Wars as a whole. (Via Daring Fireball.)

Here’s my plan. I’m starting a petition asking the city of Orlando to change its name to LANDO. Star Wars Celebration V will be in in town, AND it’s the 30th anniversary of The Empire Strikes Back. So let the force be with us during this epic week.

Lando is not a city, he’s a man!